President Sticky Rice?

Election officials in Boston are concerned about plans to create election ballots in Chinese, state officials have introduced a plan calling for Chinese ballots to be distributed in precincts with prominent Chinese-speaking populations. Because of the lack of Chinese characters that match presidential candidates' last names, the translators have been picking characters that match the syllables of those names. Thus Mitt Romney will be known as "Sticky Rice" and Barack Obama as "Oh Bus Horse".
I have a suggestion for these concerned officials, stick with English...it's worked pretty good for this long. If these people live in America and want to vote in America they should at least learn English enough to participate in the everyday affairs of this country. If they want to speak Chinese among their friends and family, read Chinese, write Chinese so be it, but at least demonstrate your willingness to contribute to society by learning English. This country shouldn't have to bend over backwards for people who won't try to fit in. This isn't just for the Chinese either, any person of any nationality who is unwilling to make that smallest of efforts to become an American shouldn't even be granted citizenship.

3...2...1...Pinned!

I want tickets! Ann Coulter has agreed to debate Elizabeth Edwards, this is going to be the most lopsided debate since John Edwards vs. Dick Cheney in 2004.

Mrs. Edwards called MSNBC's "Hardball" where Ann was giving an interview and accused her of lowering "the political dialogue". Apparently, Mrs. Edwards was referring to the comment made by Coulter on Monday that she just wished that John Edwards had been "killed in a terrorist assassination plot," Coulter was picking up on remarks made by HBO's Bill Maher to the same effect about Dick Cheney. Mrs. Edwards then continued by mentioning Coulter's comment that she wouldn't talk about Edwards because you had to go to rehab if you said the word "Faggot," and continuing back to things Coulter said during the Democratic presidential primaries in 2004 about Edwards politicizing his son's death.

During this rant Mrs. Edwards suddenly popped this gem in, "We can't have a debate about issues if you're using this kind of language." At which Coulter said she would debate Mrs. Edwards.

This debate (which won't actually take place) will be over before it starts, I predict a ringer for Coulter.

"Zero Intelligence"

This time the "zero tolerance" laws for schools have gone too far.

#1 Fifth-graders in Racho Palos Verdes, California decorated their promotion mortarboards with American flags and toy soldiers to support the troops in Iraq. These patriotic kids were ordered by school officials to cut off the tiny plastic weapons that the toy soldiers were holding. So now plastic 1/2 inch weapons are a danger to students? There is a difference between safe and stupid.

#2 In Rhode Island, a kindergartner was suspended for having a plastic knife to cut cookies with. I'm surprised the school didn't call the FBI to investiagte, the kid is probbaly part of a terrorist plot to attack all kindergarten schools in Rhode Island...give me a break.

#3 Last year in Portsmouth, Rhode Island, senior Patrick Agin was told that his senior picture of him dressed up in his medieval re-enactor's costume would not be put in the school yearbook because he was holding a sword in the picture. Agin understood his school's policy for no weapons on school grounds, he had never brought the sword to school, and yet his photo was being censored. This year school officials relented and published the yearbook with the photo. Agin was quoted as saying, "You can't really have a zero tolerance. We have track and field. We throw javelins. If you think about it, you can pretty much make anything into a weapon." Agin is right "zero tolerance" is a joke.